do you ever think how bitchy and annoying you really are and wonder how anyone ever tolerates you
*takes off shirt in front of girl* you like this? i got this pink line from sitting down for a long time. sometimes i get two lines.
[job interviewer voice] we found naked pictures of you during a quick google search for your name and we wish to inform you…… that your bod is slammin’ 10/10 you’re hired see you monday
"when women wear makeup they’re basically lying to us" well i don’t see why i’m being blamed for a man stupid enough to really think i have red and gold eyelids
it’s 2014 and body hair still does the thing where it grows back when u get rid of it??? wow get ur shit together science